Sexuality is one of the many things that define us as human beings. Often, people confuse gender and sexual orientation. Sexual orientation refers to what an individual is attracted to (or not attracted to) sexually. Romantic attraction refers to what a person is attracted to romantically. Gender refers to the sex to which the person identifies.
What is sexuality?
As mentioned above, sexuality is what attracts a person physically, romantically, and erotically. Sexuality can be fluid for some individuals and shift throughout one’s lifetime. If you imagine sexuality as a continuum with completely gay at one end and completely heterosexual at the other, some individuals may flow freely up and down that continuum throughout their lives.
Types of Sexual and Romantic Orientations
Alloromantic: This is a term for individuals who experience romantic attractions. This attraction can be to the same or any other gender.
Allosexual: The ability to experience sexual attraction. The term does not describe the target of sexual attraction, so someone who is allosexual could be heterosexual, gay, bisexual, or pansexual.
Androsexual: This refers to a sexual attraction to males and masculinity, regardless of one’s own gender identity.
Aromantic: Aromantic individuals do not experience romantic attraction.
Asexual: Asexual is lacking a sexual attraction. It does not mean the total absence of self-directed sex, and it is not a choice.
Autoromantic: Autoromantic individuals experience romantic feelings towards themselves more so than others.
Bicurious: Bicurious people are heterosexual individuals who are curious about sex with someone of the same sex.
Biromantic: A person who is romantically attracted to two (or all) genders or individuals whose genders are the same or different than their own. There may or may not be a sexual attraction as well.
Bisexual: An attraction to more than one gender. While Bi does mean two, the modern meaning of bisexuality is intended to encompass more than two.
Demiromantic: These individuals do not experience a romantic connection until after a deep emotional connection has been made. This can be sexual, platonic, or a combination. Forming a deep emotional connection does not automatically mean the romantic connection will be made; it simply means the possibility now exists.
Demisexual: This refers to someone who does not experience a sexual attraction until after a deep emotional connection has been made. This can be sexual, platonic, or a combination. Forming a deep emotional connection does not automatically mean the sexual attraction will happen; it simply means the possibility now exists
Fluid: A fluid individual does not have a static sexual orientation, and this means their attractions towards people of different genders can change.
Gay: An individual sexually attracted to a person of the same sex.
Gynosexual: An individual attracted to a feminine gender presentation.
Heteroromantic: Individuals who feel romantic attraction to genders unlike one’s own. This commonly refers to men attracted to women and women attracted to men.
Heterosexuality: An individual who is sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex/gender.
Homoromantic: Romantic attraction to the same gender or genders similar to one’s own. This does not necessarily mean a sexual attraction.
Homosexuality: Having a sexual attraction to individuals of the same gender. This term has fallen out of favor with the gay community due to the term historically being used to marginalize gay people. This term used to be used exclusively to describe men but has come to mean all those with a sexual attraction to the same gender.
Lesbian: Historically defined as a woman attracted to women. This can include romantic and sexual attractions.
Monosexual: An individual who is attracted to one gender exclusively. This can refer to gay or straight individuals so long as the attraction is to one gender.
Multisexual: An all-encompassing term for people attracted to more than one gender.
Pansexual: The individual experiences sexual attraction without gender being a factor. A pansexual person could be attracted to any gender.
Panromantic: An individual who experiences romantic attraction, and the gender identity of the other person is not a factor.
Polysexual: A sexual attraction to many sexual genders.
Queer: Queer is an over-arching term that has come to define those individuals who do not identify as heterosexual or cisgender.
Skoliosexual: An individual exclusively attracted to non-binary and genderqueer individuals. The newer term is ceterosexual.
Spectrasexual: A sexual attraction to individuals from a wide range of genders and gender identities.
This list should not be considered exhaustive.
Why is Sexuality & Sexual Identity Important?
Sexuality is important because it is what makes us human! Sexual identity is vital because it can provide a starting point in relationships, communication, and self-awareness. It offers comfort and is good for our psychological well-being as well. And it can reduce marginalization of those considered sexual minorities.
Mr. Steven Rego is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker who works with individuals and couples. Mr. Rego uses an eclectic mix of therapeutic modalities like EMDR and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help get at the root of psychological issues. Mr. Rego specializes in sex therapy, trauma, PTSD, depression, anxiety, and OCD. He also works extensively with couples.
